I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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