So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize