i just had sex bonerless
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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