Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
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