erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
