I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize