She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Randomize
