$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
