is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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