I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
my being single is dangerous.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I deserve this hangover.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
