You smell like stripper and shame
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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