remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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