whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
