Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
