so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
