I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
