Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
