ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
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