Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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