I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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