I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Randomize
