We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Randomize
