Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
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