Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
Still canโt get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. Itโs a good day everywhere
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ๐๐๐๐
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