I hate your face
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
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