You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
