Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
