please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
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