Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
