she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
My dick has a subreddit
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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