I don't think brook has ever known best
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
