Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
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