just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Randomize
