Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
