Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
tell your sister to shave her snatch
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
