I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
