i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize