My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize
