Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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