bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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