I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize