so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize