Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
