does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
