I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I checked into jail on foursquare
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
My dick has a subreddit
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
