i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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