you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Randomize
