Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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