? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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