Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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