Whod you bang
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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