All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
